Poking The Bear

Truth be told, I was reluctant to publish a Stanley Cup Finals post because it would be impossible to write one without bias. But after tonight's game, it's just too hard to stay away from all the storylines that this series has to offer. So let's get to it, starting [of course] with the headline that the media has already beaten to death. I've got to get my whacks in, before it stops being cool.

Burrows Bites Bergeron
Not OK. Everybody knows it happened; if it didn't happen we wouldn't be talking about it anymore. That said, this story needs to go away. The Lucic taunt was over the line. Sure, it was easy for him to cockily offer a finger with the score 4-0 in the 3rd, but I think he'll come to regret it in what we'd expect to be a much closer game 4.

Thomas vs. Luongo
The two goalies, both finalists for the Vezina Trophy, are without a doubt the two best netminders in the league. Both goaltenders are capable of putting their respective teams on their backs and almost singlehandedly winning games. That said, they have their weaknesses too. Thomas, of course, is prone to excessive aggression that can lead to some soft goals. Luongo, on the other hand, is quite susceptible to having games get away from him and is often criticized for struggling in big moments. Right now, Thomas has all the momentum, coming off of a 40-save performance.

Horton Gets Rocked
Five minutes and seven seconds into Game 3, Nathan Horton got completely ruined by Aaron Rome. It was a dirty hit and exactly the kind that the NHL hoped to avoid with the creation of Rule 48. Bruins fans will find the hit highly reminiscent of Matt Cooke's cheapshot against Marc Savard; hockey fans in general were likely reminded of R.J. Umberger's face as Horton stared blankly towards the ceiling. If there wasn't bad blood between these two teams, there is now. But there was, so now there's more.


America vs. Canada
The Bruins-Canucks series is stirring up some deep emotions. Let's not forget what's at the root of it all: the Canada vs. USA debate. Canada brought such wonderful things into the world as Tim Hortons, Robin Scherbatsky, and even hockey itself. But this is Amurica. We created much cooler sports, like football and Slamball. We [eventually] killed Bin Laden. We invented the piano key necktie. As if it's even a competition. USA! USA!

Countdown Friday: Top 10 Last Minute NHL Goals

I only have a few weeks left where I can do NHL posts without looking like an idiot. On Wednesday, Vancouver's Raffi Torres nabbed the game-winning goal in Game 1 of the Stanley Cup Finals with only seconds left. And so I bring you the Top 10 Last Minute NHL Goals.

...Minnesota Northstars sighting?

Ohio St. Player Found A Penny, Picked It Up, And Got Suspended For 8 Games

First, Terrelle Pryor and company got suspended in a tattoo scandal. (Sweet ink, brah.) Then, there was was that whole business about getting cars for free. Recently, head coach Jim Tressel and his career record of 106-22 were forced to resign in the midst of a cover up scandal that has drawn numerous comparisons to Watergate. Note: it is quite different from Watergate.

Now, one more scandal has rocked Buckeye nation. Freshman quarterback Junior Floyd will miss the first 8 games of the upcoming 2011 season for violating NCAA rules. Floyd was leaving the OSU practice facility on Monday when he spotted a shiny 2010 penny on the ground. After careful scrutiny, Floyd determined that the penny was indeed displaying heads. He then picked up the penny with the hope that it would provide him with favorable luck in the future.

After the careful consideration that accompanies so many NCAA decisions, NCAA president James William Bottomtooth III announced that Floyd was guilty of receiving improper benefits. "Simply put," said Bottomtooth, "Floyd has access to facilities that the OSU general student body lacks. He used that access to make a profit, and he must be punished for it."

Many Buckeye supporters are outraged that the punishment does not match the crime. According to Bottomtooth, however, "a 1943 penny recently sold for $1.7 million. That means that 68 years from now, Floyd received $1.7 million in improper benefits, $1,699,999.99 more than it appears."

Seems like sound logic to me.

Countdown Friday: The Top 7 Game Sevens

They say that the two greatest words in sports are "Game Seven." Personally, I have to advocate for other duos, like "sudden death,""unnecessary roughness," and "trampoline basketball." Still, there's no denying how incredible game sevens are. We've already had six amazing game sevens in the NHL playoffs and one [forgettable] seventh game in this NBA postseason. So in honor of the "win or go home" contest, I bring you the top seven game sevens.

7. MLB: Boston Red Sox 10, New York Yankees 3 (2004)

The game itself was unremarkable, but this game seven had to make the list because of the story behind it. En route to a curse reversal, the Red Sox came back from an 0-3 hole against the rival Yankees and completed the miracle comeback with this game seven beatdown.

6. NHL: Philadelphia Flyers 4, Boston Bruins 3 (2010)


Boston gave a beating one year, and took one only a few years later. The Philadelphia Flyers came back after trailing 0-3 in the series and then completed a comeback within a comeback while trailing 0-3 in game seven. Simon Gagne's goal late in the third period gave the Flyers the 4-3 game and series win.

5. NBA: Houston Rockets 115, Phoenix Suns 114 (1995)


In one of the most dramatic NBA game sevens in history, the Houston Rockets edged Charles Barkley's Phoenix Suns by a mere one point in the Western Conference semifinals. Mario Elie (of course) hit the go-ahead three pointer that put the Rockets up for good.

4. NHL: Rangers 2, New Jersey Devils 1 [2 OT] (1994)

There's nothing like sudden death in a game seven. This historic play call is all you need to enjoy this drama.

3. Boston Celtics 125, St. Louis Hawks 123 [2 OT] (1957)

This one happened way back when they only played basketball in black and white. The Celtics needed two overtime periods to win, but they narrowly edged out St. Louis behind 37 points and 23 rebounds from rookie point guard Tommy Heinsohn.

2. Detroit Red Wings 4, New York Rangers 3 [2 OT] (1950)

Even without an injured Gordie Howe, the Red Wings managed to pull off the victory in game seven of the Stanley Cup finals. It was the first Stanley Cup ever decided in overtime of a game seven.

1. MLB: Pirates 10, Yankees 9 (1960)

The number one game seven features what many sports historians and fans consider to be the number one home run of all time. After a back and forth battle, the Yankees rallied to tie the game in the top of the ninth. But the Pirates had the last at bat, and won the series on the famous Bill Mazeroski home run, the only game seven walk-off homer ever.

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