Thursday, April 7, 2011

Inside The Genius

Today we have a special guest article from James, champion of the Sports Casual NCAA March Madness Challenge. Congratulations James; you're welcome as a contributor any time.

*Disclaimer: Sports Casual is not responsible for the vulgarity of any guest writers* 

Possible Pts
212212161632 (Connecticut)119119
I know what I'm doing...
2418128160 (Notre Dame)7878
Bieber for 3
211812800 (Kansas)5959
Boomshackalacka *
26128800 (Pittsburgh)5454
Gators bitches be usin Jimmers
251612000 (Duke)5353
Sen Ditin Je Rome
22148800 (Kansas)5252
please scrowe me
21208000 (Kansas)4949
22188000 (Duke)4848
12-5 Upset special
25184000 (Kansas)4747
The Saskatoon Totem Pole
22108000 (Michigan)4040
Lowest Scoring Bracket Ever?
1000000 (Boston U.)1010

    For the first time in my life I won my March Madness bracket pool….and I am giving an exclusive look into the genius behind my picks.
    Inspired by George Costanza , I did the opposite of what my instincts told me to do every other year when I was coming dead-last behind girls who go to uconn picking their homeschool to win and my senile grandfather who probably thinks NCAA basketball is some sort of vintage negro-league.  For starters I moved to Italy in January.  Seriously.  On top of the fact that the apartment I live in here doesn’t have internet, American college hoops isn’t exactly what people are watching or talking about at bars here.  They actually might be but my Italian sucks so that wouldn’t really help anyways.  

    I think what helped the most is that I haven’t watched a single college basketball game this season and I haven’t watched SportsCenter since January.  Normally my instincts would tell me that would be a bad idea for trying to predict who is going to win the national championship. Wrong.  Every other year I waste hours changing my picks around until I finally think I’ve got it.  This year I filled my bracket out in a single sitting and didn’t change it once.  I couldn’t even watch the games that I picked because again, there aren’t many Kemba Walker fans in the small medieval style Italian city that I currently call home.  And it all worked.  My bracket didn’t just win, it dominated. It raped. Literally forced itself upon your bracket pretending it didn’t here its cries of no.

    So there you have it. If you want to win next years bracket there’s only one way to do it. Flee the country.  Don’t watch college basketball games or look to SportsCenter for help. Put minimal time into your picks and don’t give them a second thought. Don’t even watch the games because it’s a waste. You already know you won.  Remember, go with the exact opposite of what your instincts have always told you.

    And P.S. I also usually do a bracket for money which is bullshit because this win literally means nothing.  Don’t tell me I won pride and bragging rights.  I gave up on having pride a while ago and who the fuck am I supposed to brag to in Italy they don’t even know what a basketball is here.

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