It's A Metaphor For A New CBA Proposal

Okay, now let's do a funny one.

In recent meetings, Roger Goodell revealed the newly proposed CBA to the owners. You can go anywhere online or turn on ESPN to hear the details in football and legal jargon. But here at Sports Casual, I like to keep things interesting. So here are three of the most important CBA details, delivered to your in poorly thought out metaphors.


Revenue Split
-Imagine all the revenue generated by NFL teams as a giant cake. In the old agreement, the players received 60% of the cake and the owners got 40%. This, however, was after the owners got to lick off all of the $1 billion frosting. Including the frosting, then, the players were only getting about 53% of the cake. And besides, who wants a cake without frosting?
-In the recently proposed CBA, there will be no $1 billion frosting licking. The players will receive roughly 48% percent of the cake and that number will never fall below 46.5%. This makes the owners happy, especially "fat" cats like Jerry Jones.

Rookie Wage Scale
-Imagine the salary levels like a ladder. Guys who make the most money get to climb towards the top, while the lowly specials teams players remain towards the bottom. In the old NFL, rookies who just showed up often got to climb over everyone to the top without proving themselves at all. Doesn't seem fair, does it? And if it just so happened that the young guy who got to climb to the top was an ass-face, he'd bring everyone down with him when he fell to the bottom.
-In the new CBA, there will be a rookie wage scale. The details haven't been hammered out, but the young players will start considerably lower on the ladder and have to earn their way up.

Salary Cap and Floor
-Finally, imagine the NFL owners - owners of lower revenue teams like the Bengals and Bills - as stereotypical Jewish bargain hunters. We take them to the mall for a couple new shirts and a nice pair of slacks. With $100 in their wallets, the "owners" know their spending cap.
-In the new CBA, we change the rules: now they must spend at least $90. For owners looking to cut costs, it's a little unsettling to have the proposed salary floor set at 90% percent of the salary cap.


While the proposed deal certainly isn't perfect, it's an improvement over where we were just a few days ago. And with the lockout approaching day 100, any progress is refreshing. Take my eyes, not the NFL!